First Frost
There is the moment when the night comes up to us and grabs our hands
It is not a threat but it feels like blood in the water - the tendons are always just about to kick - the fists are always clenching and unclenching there is a grinding sound under the skin - it is velvet but burned it smells like canned air - we are on fire together
Getting out of the car tonight may feel like a death - air escaping like prisoners fleeing labyrinthine hallways into the cold of everything
But
Above will be found the stars where they were left still silver in the blue expanse of space - Orion notching an arrow at the backs of the Pleides
The roof of the car beside mine was covered in frost - thin and translucent - I was urged by an unknown force to rake my finger across the surface - and I did
Fingers come away cold and wet and covered in light - the ink of winter seeping into the bones of autumn - around us the cars all twinkle it is a calm
There is a moment when night comes up and puts its hands to our throats
Not a threatening gesture - an honest one
The rasps of its nails speaking about the darkness within us - the heat of its eyes a cipher - night is a void filling with the answers to questions asked in daylight
At the top of the cycle there is death - at the bottom there is more
Somewhere in between is a sort of daylight - a moment where hope exists - where the growing isn't futile and it will not just end again
Fuck - it burns -
Showing posts with label scars. Show all posts
Showing posts with label scars. Show all posts
09 November 2016
04 August 2016
Poem-A-Day #157 : Wood (Part 4 : On Bears)
Wood (Part 4 : On Bears)
It's the scar that is a forest fire but on my hand : thin thread-like thing that aches in the rain : Do you suppose that the forest aches in the rain that it feels intensely what has come before like a phantom limb : over here was Jerry he was a good tree I miss Jerry : or do you suppose the forest forgets immediately : that to continue for so long you have to drop the baggage at the door :
There's a theory that you are most likely to forget if you go through a doorway : something about exiting a space and entering another causes the brain to lose track of itself : it's the need to reconfigure : the brain has to analyze and create the room you are going in to so it drops the one you left at the threshold in a sort of shopping bag that it can come back to in a moment if needed :
Brains are correcting for interference at all times : turning things right side up changing the color making sense of the live feed coming from all directions : all fingers in the air looking for which way the wind blows : stick your finger in your mouth : which way does it blow : you don't have to do that but it's always good to know the weather :
I stayed at a small casita in Taos for three months working on a novel : the walls were always cool to the touch and felt smooth like porcelain : the front door was thick wood that wouldn't close all the way you'd have to shoulder it in place while you turned the lock or it would pop open in the middle of the night after everything cooled :
There was a large black bear that hung around the place and would raid the trash at night : once when I was feeling particularly brave I flung open the door and yelled into the night : the bear sat a few feet away eating some paper my outburst had forced it to pause mid-bite : it stared at me like a child caught eating cookies before dinner I apologized and watched it until it was done :
I've only had a moment with one other bear : I was in the car and it was raining it must have been in high school or the first year after I started college so 1999 or 2000 or something like that : it was raining and we stopped at the bank because my mother was driving and needed cash from the ATM and for some reason she stopped not in a parking spot : probably because it was raining :
My grandmother and I were in the car and two small bear cubs came from around the corner of the bank towards the main road and then across it quickly the mother came next watching head back and forth searching for danger : we held out breath even though we were a good distance from her : she looked at us then went : my mother came moments later and didn't believe us :
It's the scar that is a forest fire but on my hand : thin thread-like thing that aches in the rain : Do you suppose that the forest aches in the rain that it feels intensely what has come before like a phantom limb : over here was Jerry he was a good tree I miss Jerry : or do you suppose the forest forgets immediately : that to continue for so long you have to drop the baggage at the door :
There's a theory that you are most likely to forget if you go through a doorway : something about exiting a space and entering another causes the brain to lose track of itself : it's the need to reconfigure : the brain has to analyze and create the room you are going in to so it drops the one you left at the threshold in a sort of shopping bag that it can come back to in a moment if needed :
Brains are correcting for interference at all times : turning things right side up changing the color making sense of the live feed coming from all directions : all fingers in the air looking for which way the wind blows : stick your finger in your mouth : which way does it blow : you don't have to do that but it's always good to know the weather :
I stayed at a small casita in Taos for three months working on a novel : the walls were always cool to the touch and felt smooth like porcelain : the front door was thick wood that wouldn't close all the way you'd have to shoulder it in place while you turned the lock or it would pop open in the middle of the night after everything cooled :
There was a large black bear that hung around the place and would raid the trash at night : once when I was feeling particularly brave I flung open the door and yelled into the night : the bear sat a few feet away eating some paper my outburst had forced it to pause mid-bite : it stared at me like a child caught eating cookies before dinner I apologized and watched it until it was done :
I've only had a moment with one other bear : I was in the car and it was raining it must have been in high school or the first year after I started college so 1999 or 2000 or something like that : it was raining and we stopped at the bank because my mother was driving and needed cash from the ATM and for some reason she stopped not in a parking spot : probably because it was raining :
My grandmother and I were in the car and two small bear cubs came from around the corner of the bank towards the main road and then across it quickly the mother came next watching head back and forth searching for danger : we held out breath even though we were a good distance from her : she looked at us then went : my mother came moments later and didn't believe us :
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